How to Choose a Gift for the Home Caregiver & What Items to Avoid

Nov 13, 2010
Mary King

Choose Sensible Useful Gifts for a Home Caregiver - dalelanham

Home caregivers enjoy holiday & birthday gifts as much as anyone else. Use careful thought and common sense before buying a gift for a long-term caregiver.

A primary home caregiver spends countless hours tending to the needs of the person in her (or his) care. What kind of gift is suitable for a parent caregiver who has a child with a serious physical condition or behavior issues? Are there circumstances one should consider – guidelines for choosing a caregiver gift – when the caregiver is looking after an elderly parent with dementia? What types of gifts would not suit a caregiver in these situations?

Think Before Buying a Caregiver Gift

A season ticket to the symphony makes a grand gift for a very good friend who's fond of classical music. But, what if the friend is a full-time caregiver for her aging mother who is in the advanced stages Alzheimer's? Does the gift come with the promise of a qualified sitter? Think about it; if there is no one willing to take the caregiver's place on concert nights, then the gift is useless.

Parents of children with high-risk medical conditions often face problems other parents don't have to think about. Presenting a young mother with incense, potpourri, scented candles or perfume for her birthday is not a wise choice if her child has a serious respiratory condition. Why not give something more acceptable, such as a pretty (scent-free) plant that requires minimal care? Flameless (unscented) candles are popular gifts that would do very nicely, too.

A pass to the circus may sound like an ideal Christmas gift for the entire family. Not so if the parents have a special-needs child that's aggravated by large crowds or a lot of noise. When in doubt about giving any kind of family-type gift, it's always best to ask the parents first, even if it means forgetting the element of surprise.

Tips on Selecting Caregiver Gifts When There's a Special-Needs Child in the Home

Keep in mind the caregiver's situation as well as that of her spouse and family. If the recipient is a caregiver that's new to the role, she may not have considered the consequences of certain gifts. Relatives and friends can help do the thinking for her. A little thoughtfulness goes a long way, especially during the holidays when emotions run high. Here are a few simple rules for choosing a gift for a caregiver.

For caregivers of children with behavior disorders:

Avoid giving the caregiver glass figurines, collector's glassware, drinking glass sets, punch bowls, glass lamps and anything that's easily broken unless the recipient can safely store such items out of sight or out of reach.
Knives (sporting or kitchen set) can be deadly weapons in a raging child's hands. Steer clear unless the parent can lock up knives and other dangerous sharp objects.
Don't buy fancy cigarette lighters or barbecue lighters that could tempt a child diagnosed with pyromania or other uncontrollable impulsive behaviors.
Inquire first before giving a pet to a caregiver or her family on Christmas morning (or any other time). An aggressive child could easily hurt or kill a defenseless small or baby animal. A large friendly dog may not tolerate an overly-aggressive child that inflicts pain.

For caregivers of children with high-risk medical conditions – particularly allergy and/or respiratory conditions:

Consult with the caregiver parent before buying perfume or anything with a scent that might aggravate a respiratory condition.
Ask the caregiver before buying food gifts for a family if a child in her care has serious food allergies that might present a problem.
If you want to give a caregiver mom or dad a sweater or other apparel, then ask before you buy. The child in his or her care may have an allergy to certain materials.
Don't buy a pet for the family unless you consult the parents first. Pet dander and fur can trigger allergy symptoms.

Choosing a Gift for the Caregiver of an Alzheimer's Patient

In-home patients with Alzheimer's or other forms of dementia can become frustrated, angry – even combative. Advanced-stage seniors often don't realize what they're doing. In the event of an angry outburst, small heavy objects like snow globes and figurines, lamps and radios, etc. make harmful projectile weapons.

Here are a few concerns when choosing a gift for the caregiver of an aging senior or Alzheimer's patient:

Make sure the gift of a concert, play or other special event doesn't go to waste because the caregiver can't get away from home and/or her duties.
Refrain from purchasing a gift item that has to be assembled (unless the gift comes with an offer to set it up or put it together).
Steer clear of complicated gifts (like a cell phone with a multitude of great features) unless it's something the caregiver really wants. Choose something that's easily programmed or something that can be used right away.
As mentioned in previous section, inquire before giving the caregiver a pet to keep her company. A pet mean trips to the vet for shots, buying pet food and general cleanup or maintenance chores. Pets can also cause mobility-challenged or sight-impaired elderly persons to fall.

Friends and distant relatives rarely have a clue as to how exhausting and how much work is involved in being a full-time home caregiver. Holidays and birthdays can be difficult times for caregivers who may have to modify traditional plans or keep celebrations low-key for the patient's sake. Choose a sensible gift for the family member who is also a home caregiver. Most gift mistakes can be avoided simply by thinking ahead and considering any dangerous scenarios that could arise.

Want to make gift-giving easier for the caregiver's extended family and friends? Discuss what caregiver gifts are sensible and what gifts should be avoided because of medical concerns or safety issues. Ask the caregiver's spouse or close friend for ideas. Above all, use common sense. Put yourself in the caregiver's place. Selecting an appropriate caregiver gift will eliminate insensitivity, useless gifts and hard feelings.